1. That ball went so high it could have got an airhostess down with it.
2. There is light at the end of the tunnel for India, but it’s that of an incoming train which will run them over.
3. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.
4. This quote was made after Ganguly called Dravid for a run and midway sent him back and Dravid was run out in the third test against the West Indies at Barbados.”Ganguly has thrown a drowning man both ends of the rope.”
5. Sri Lankan score is running like an Indian taximeter.
6. Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.
7. Wickets are like wives - you never know which way they will turn!
8. He is like Indian three-wheeler, which will suck a lot of diesel but cannot go beyond 30!
9. The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend that the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world, which does not have wings!
10. As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.
11. The ball whizzes past like a bumble -bee and the Indians are in the sea.
12. The Indians are finding the gaps like a pin a haystack.
13. The pitch is as dead as a dodo.
14. Deep Dasgupta is as confused as a child is in a topless bar!
15. The way Indian wickets are falling reminds of the cycle stand at Rajendra Talkies in Patiala one falls and everything else falls!
16. Indian team without Sachin is like giving Kiss without a Squeeze.
17. You cannot make Omelets without breaking the eggs.
18. Deep Dasgupta is not a Wicket Keeper, he is a goalkeeper. He must be given a free transfer to Manchester United.
19. He will fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites too.
20. One, who doesn’t throw the dice, can never expect to score a six.
21. This quote was made after Eddie Nichols, the third umpire, ruled Shivnarine Chanderpaul ‘NOT OUT’ in the second test at Port of Spain T&T “Eddie Nichols is a man who cannot find his own buttocks with his two hands.”
22. Anybody can pilot a ship when the sea is calm.
23. Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.
24. You got to choose between tightening your belt or losing your pants.
25. The cat with gloves catches no mice.
26. Age has been perfect fire extinguisher for flaming youth.
27. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
28. He is like a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition.
29. The third umpires should be changed as often as nappies and for the same reason.
30. Kumble’s bowling at the moment is flat as a Dosa

Set aback by mass injuries to all the leading pacemen, selectors were forced to select a list of probables before the final team is selected.

Here’s the probables: Anil Kumble, Mahendra Singh Dhoni, Wasim Jaffer, Dinesh Karthik, Sachin Tendulkar, Rahul Dravid, VVS Laxman, Yuvraj Singh, Sourav Ganguly, RP Singh, Munaf Patel, Zaheer Khan, VRV Singh, Pankaj Singh, Ishant Sharma, Murali Kartik, Harbhajan Singh, Piyush Chawla, Aakash Chopra, Gautam Gambhir, Ranadeb Bose, Irfan Pathan, Ajit Agarkar, Parthiv Patel

The final XVI should be a composition of experience and youth. It is worthless to carry people who aren’t in good form and have no set future ahead of them. Ideally the team should have 7 batsmen, 2 spinners, 5 fast bowlers and 2 keepers. Here’s my recommended team that needs to travel to Australia:
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Sir,

I am writing this letter with a heavy heart as I hold you in high esteem. However, the current situation vis-a-vis my position as the Chairman of selection committee has compelled me to write this letter to you.

I am really appalled at the way the BCCI has treated its selectors of late. The recent gag order issued by the BCCI wherein a lot of restrictions on freedom of speech or even movement have been imposed on the selectors, which I feel is rather unfortunate. It has not only humiliated us for doing selfless service to Indian cricket but also shown us in a very poor light.
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